Opal O. Murray – Life Coach
HOLLYWOOD – In May I will conduct a workshop titled: Return to You; Journey to your Promised Land. While preparing for the session, I realized that our Journey is accompanied by two critical actions: a) initiating and b) committing to the journey.
My plan is to use the Exodus story, written in four books of the Holy Bible as the backdrop for the workshop. I will liken initiating the journey to the call Moses received and we will talk about the people’s commitment to reach their land of ‘milk and honey’ despite the many obstacles they faced.
While creating the workshop, I thought of the similarities the story had with raising our children, especially our commitment to our children. The thought was even more pronounced as I watched the evening news and saw our children being wanted for crimes involving: robbing, raping, beating, killing, etc. I tried to turn back the hands of time and imagined them as babies. I pictured them being held, cuddled and loved. I wondered what images of adulthood were envisioned for these, our babies. Did we, as parents, grandparents and other relatives, create a vision of productive, honest and caring citizens? Or was this current reality of robbers, rapists, abusers and murderers the vision? Maybe there was no vision whatsoever. The ancient wisdom says ‘where there is no vision, the people perish’. Is this what is happening to our communities? We had no vision for success for our children? If this is true, is it because we are too busy earning dead presidents in order to afford our immediate needs therefore causing us to miss opportunities for ‘luxuries’ such as creating the long term vision for our children’s well-being? Is it that we are caught up in our day to day activities that we do not find the time to teach our children the ‘thou shalls and thou shall nots’ which are critical to guide them into being compassionate, contributing adults? I ask, what must be done to show our commitment to our children?
As a Life Coach, I am more accustomed to supporting my clients as they give birth to an idea and guiding them as they strengthen their commitment to bringing the idea to fruition. To do the latter, I sometimes share information on four types of commitment: political, intellectual, emotional and spiritual, with my clients. Briefly, a political commitment is made only when something can be had in return for engaging in the commitment, e.g. I will study so that I can pass my exam. Secondly, an intellectual commitment is made when we act because we believe an activity is a good idea. E.g. I think it is a good idea to attend school. When we act because of anger, fear, love, etc. – any type of emotion, we make an emotional commitment. Lastly, a spiritual commitment is performing a task knowing that it is larger than you – e.g. Mrs. Rosa Parks refusing to give up her seat as was required by the segregation laws in Alabama. Spiritual commitment is Divine. It is a call from your Higher Self, your God.
If we are to guide our children into an adulthood where they build rather than destroy, where they practice love rather than fear and hatred, then our commitment to them must be spiritual. We – mothers and fathers- must make and understand this commitment prior to the conception/adoption of this precious life. We must take on the responsibilities of guiding and loving this life. Once we make the commitment we will know that pure, unadulterated Love is all that matters.
We will know that Love will guide our actions in raising our children. Wisdom will emanate from our Love to teach us when, where and how to do what must be done with, to and for our children. We will help them to maintain clean hearts. We will: observe their actions; notice the people, places and things to which they are drawn; know the activities in which they find delight; strengthen them when destructive forces surround them; encourage them when they hear words from those who have not taken the time to touch their souls and we will remind them how valuable they are. In doing so, we will not only teach our children to value themselves but they too will value all Creation. Making a spiritual commitment worked for Moses, it works for ideas and it will work for us and our children.
Our African ancestors say: “Children are the reward of life.” Our spiritual commitment to our children is our commitment to our lives!
May your Mothering and Fathering Days be filled with endurance, strength, courage, faith, hope and love.
